Fly Monkeys, Fly

My work experience boys have come and gone, I wish I could say their time here was well spent but it wasn’t, my old TAFE teacher sent me a whining mummy’s boy and a sleeper cell Alkida terrorist. Im hoping he sends me some suicide girls next time as this place is a real boys club.

Anyway, I was asked to do a supervisor review for them, which I will paste shortly. My boss read my reviews, his face twisted as if I asked him if I could milk a pigeon, to which he proceeded to re-write my review, I can honestly say that my writing is a blunt axe and my bosses is like a surgical scalpel, his review was nice, too nice, like wiping your ass with silk.

Now on with the show.

Has-bin ladin

Has-bin ladin has shown that he has the ability to work in a team and has the customer service skill to work at a helpdesk, but also appears to be introverted.

Has-bin ladin follows instructions very well, whether written or spoken instructions, he is quiet, very quiet. Has-bin ladin is polite and courteous to those he has already met; he seems to have trouble talking to strangers

Has-bin ladin has shown that he can work independently and as a team with his TAFE partner Mummy’s boy. His work ethic is commendable, with an attitude that is thorough.

Punctually was of small concern, Has-bin ladin showed up on time for the majority of work placement, he and Mummy’s boy would show up early but would also ask to leave early, sometimes leaving midway through a task.

Has-bin ladin showed initiative when I was present but none at any other time; Has-bin ladin was a potential helpdesk candidate for employment, his only downfall being his lack of communication, He cannot function/work with strangers if he cannot speak to them.

*This is not in the review but ill add it anyway*

Has-bin ladin has been profiled by our resident psychologist and what was found was rather disturbing, his deep seeded desires were revealed to us early on and we would like to wish him good luck in his dream of opening a phone shop in Bankstown and selling over priced accessories. Wulla bro, I swear.

Mummy’s boy

Mummy’s boy ability to work cooperatively with teams members was rather lacking, he only worked with his TAFE partner Has-bin ladin and was afraid to speak to anybody else. Mummy’s boy interaction with the helpdesk only ever occurred when forced by my instruction.

His listening skills need improvement as verbal instructions had the opposite outcome as what was intended. His work ethic was non existent, showing up late from time to time, not showing up when scheduled and conveniently calling in sick when Has-bin ladin could not come to work.

Mummy’s boy also had a habit of complaining about anything and everything; he twice threw a hissy fit and made me aware of “face” and Asian pride.

Over all Mummy’s boys attitude during work placement was that of complete disinterest.

Lack of confidence when dealing with the unknown is also his biggest downfall, I believe this is due to Mummy’s boys immaturity as a person and not his age, we would recommend that Mummy’s boy start in a junior helpdesk position, build on his life skills and possibly join a mentoring program.

Further to this, our resident psychological profiler told us Mummy’s boy seems to have no direction in life; he desires to obtain a job from work experience yet shows no desire to actually get the job.

Mummy’s boys technical ability is very high and has shown that he can learn quickly. His mastery of our in-house software was a surprise.

Our concern was that he has the technical ability but not the skill to put them to use. “Put the power to the ground” so to speak.

Mummy’s boys technical ability only proves that he can assemble machines on a production line at Dell, he requires more than diplomas and knowledge.

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So there we have it, I would not hire these boys to clean my shoes.

Lesson learned, never try and you wont fail.